This Is Womanhood: The Story of Setting Your Own Terms

Article by Dr Sotiria Moschopoulou, Founder of RooMate

Womanhood doesn’t need to be defined by someone else. Not by another person, and not on anyone else’s terms. It’s yours.

So I’ll start with mine, because it isn’t a neat definition. It’s a list that changes.

Sometimes my womanhood is a lot of testosterone and a lot of dopamine. Sometimes it’s loving, and self-loving, a lot. Sometimes it’s the gym. Sometimes it’s a room full of people, and sometimes it’s speaking to no one for a whole day. Some weeks it’s a lot of downtime to myself and a lot of reflection.

It’s hairy legs and hairy armpits on some days. It’s coconut oil on my skin and face, and nothing else. It’s the same trainers, bought six times, because they’re convenient. It’s wearing shorts because they’re convenient. It’s wearing nice dresses without high heels.

None of this is a rule. And that’s the point. Womanhood isn’t a set term, and it shouldn’t be one. The moment a definition becomes a standard, somebody ends up measuring themselves against it.

It took me a while to see that. For a long time it felt easier to edit myself to fit what I thought a woman, or a woman founder, should look and sound like. The truth is that it doesn’t feel easier. It feels like performing, and performing is tiring.

Setting your own terms is scary. It’s also, honestly, so freaking enjoyable and wholesome.It sets you free.And that is scary too.

Why this belongs on the RooMate blog

RooMate exists because of one idea: every room should be navigable for women. Safer, trusted housing in Greece, Paris and London. A home is the one place where you shouldn’t have to perform, edit or explain yourself. It should be the room where you can be exactly who you are.

That’s what I want RooMate to protect: the freedom to be a woman on your own terms, in a space that’s safe.

Your turn

What’s your womanhood? Sometimes this, sometimes that, always one thing? Write it down, share it, tell me if you like. If you’re a woman builder, a woman founder, or a woman questioning her womanhood or accepting it in her entirety, I’d love to hear yours.

Womanhood is you. Nothing else. No one else.

Dr Sotiria Moschopoulou is a Greek dentist, 3-year Airbnb Superhostess and 5-year landlady based in London, and the founder of RooMate, a trust-based roommate matching platform for women in Athens, Paris and London. RooMate operates as a single-sex service under Schedule 3, Part 7 of the Equality Act 2010.